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Because of Edward Cullen, human boys have lost their charm.
Wednesday, October 29, 2008
this is funny. read it somewhr in face book.--------------
1.
Reading about Edward Cullen has not only changed our perspective of guys, but vanquished human charm altogether.
Thank you, Stephenie Meyer, now I'll never find a man.
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2.
Group checklist:
If you/you've..
... look out your bedroom window at night and wish Edward would climb through it and sing you a lullabye to sleep...
... squeal at the sight of a Volvo, especially shiny silver ones...
...ever almost gotten into an accident cause you were too busy staring or following a Volvo while driving...
... despaired at how your 'real' boyfriend just cant be dazzling/perfect/dreamy/insert-your
.. cant stop associating things to Edward (Debussy! Linkin Park! Mountain Lions! Chicago! Heroin (well, your own brand of)! Bronze-colored hair! Lullabyes! Topaz! Feather pillows! Volvos! Anaphase and the other stages of Mitosis! Blood-typing at Bio class! the Spanish influenza!) and turn practically almost every conversation into a Twilight reference...
... ever drive really, really fast and think 'Holy Crow! I'm driving like a Cullen' or 'I hate driving slow'...
.. ever wanted to jump in front of a van to see if Edward will jump in and save you...
.. ever felt proud that you're a Brunette, or wished you were one, cause Edward prefers them...
.. freak out at the very mention of the name 'Edward', even if it was over the PA system of a grocery store, or a random mention while you're channel-surfing..
... ever gone to the doctor and wondered where Carlisle was so you can ask him about Edward...
.. wondered whether that boy ignoring you in school is only doing that cause he's a vampire and it would be 'more prudent' if you werent friends with him...
.. wished you woke up covered in feathers.. or broke your bed's headboard.. yes, for THAT reason..
.. ever asked this very important question: 'Dammit, Edward, Why Arent You Real?!!'...
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3.
FORGET PRINCE CHARMING, IM WAITING FOR MY EDWARD CULLEN.
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LMAO.
i almost umchio and laughed til i died.